Why Having Money Isn't the Same as Feeling Secure

"If only I had more money, everything would fall into place."

It's a thought many of us have had, and on the surface, it makes sense.

Money buys food. It pays rent. It keeps the lights on. Sometimes we think once we have enough of it, our worries should disappear.

Meanwhile, something interesting happens in real life. To an extent, we all know someone who has had something like this happen to…

Mr. A., who has struggled financially, suddenly receives a large payment and, instead of making the "smart" financial decisions everyone expects, he buys far more expensive food than usual. He bought expensive clothes he always wanted. He moved into a bigger, luxurious apartment, and also bought the latest phone. He spends so much that, a few months later, he is back where he started.

People watching from the outside would shake their heads and say statements like “That's why he is still poor. He doesn’t know how to manage money. If it were me, I'd have invested it."

Funny thing is, I used to be one of those asking the wrong question. Then I started reading about it and asked questions like: what if this isn't simply about financial literacy and more about psychology?

A few months ago, I experienced something that totally challenged the way I had always thought about this.

I had carefully planned my finances. My salary was expected on schedule, so I budgeted accordingly- as per the smart money woman I’m trying to be. Some money had already gone into investments, and I was genuinely excited because, for once, everything seemed to be moving in the right direction.

Then my salary was delayed for some days; that was long enough for my carefully designed plan to completely collapse. For the first time in a long while, I found myself thinking about food far more than I normally would. Ordinarily, I can become so immersed in work that I suddenly realize it's noon and I haven't eaten. If I'm tired, I simply order food or buy something nearby because I already know I'll be able to eat.

Food isn't something I consciously think about. It seems predictable. Meanwhile, during that period, I started calculating meals instead of what idea to develop next. Should I eat now? Can I afford meat today? How many days can this bag of rice last?

I noticed the content of my thoughts had changed, and it’s not because I had become less ambitious or less disciplined. It’s just that my brain had shifted its attention toward survival.

After some weeks that felt like years, some money came in.

What was one of the first things I did?

I bought an unusually large amount of food- more than I normally would. Then TEMU happened to me. I think you all know how it goes from there!

Looking back, it wasn't the most strategic financial decision. At first, I judged myself for it. Then I became curious.

Why had I, someone who usually tries to plan carefully, responded this way?

There is a theory in Psychology called “Abraham Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs”.

Maslow proposed that human motivation tends to follow a progression. Before we can devote ourselves to belonging, esteem, creativity, or personal fulfilment, our physiological needs like food, water, shelter, and rest must be reasonably met, followed by needs for safety and security. It simply says that when survival is uncertain, it becomes difficult to focus on anything else.

An important thing to note is that basic needs are not met simply because they are available today.

They are met when they become predictable. There's a profound difference between eating today and knowing you will eat tomorrow without worrying about it. Same way as there is a difference between having electricity tonight and trusting it will still be there when you wake up. There's a difference between receiving a salary this month and knowing, with confidence, when the next one will arrive. Predictability changes the way the mind works.

So let’s check out how modern psychological research can help to explain why.

Two behavioral scientists, Sendhil Mullainathan and Eldar Shafir, in their work on scarcity, argue that scarcity doesn't simply mean having less. It changes how we think.

For instance, when essential resources feel uncertain, the mind narrows its focus toward the immediate problem, which psychologists sometimes describe as "tunneling."

Your attention becomes consumed by whatever feels scarce. When food is uncertain, thoughts revolve around food. When money is uncertain, every expense becomes mentally exhausting. When time is scarce, everything suddenly feels urgent.

Since our brain is always trying to protect us, this narrowing of attention can be adaptive in the short term because it helps us respond to immediate threats. However, the cost is that it leaves less mental bandwidth for long-term planning, creativity, learning, or strategic decision-making.

In other words, scarcity doesn't reduce intelligence. It competes for attention and makes important areas of intelligence not at their full speed.

Which is why I no longer think the most important question is if people have enough, but instead, if they can reliably predict that they'll continue to have enough. That’s why the one-time huge help (money, time, shelter, etc.) might not be enough.

This is so because predictability is psychologically freeing. When your brain no longer has to monitor whether food, electricity, housing, transportation, or income will disappear tomorrow, it begins to redirect those cognitive resources elsewhere.

It starts redirecting toward relationships, toward learning, toward creativity, and toward building/thriving rather than merely surviving. Do you think in a way this might explain a part of why young people are avoiding marriage?

So let’s shift it a little to everyday life in Nigeria.

For instance, electricity. Many of us have become accustomed to, Up NEPA! Which is almost a cultural joke. It’s common knowledge that electricity in most part of the country represents unpredictability. So what psychological effect does it have?

When electricity is unpredictable, your day is no longer organized around your priorities. It's organized around power availability. You rush to charge devices. You postpone work. You rearrange meetings. You cook when electricity allows. You wash clothes when electricity returns. Your attention repeatedly shifts back toward managing uncertainty.

This same principle applies to delayed salaries, inconsistent water supply, unstable internet, and other everyday uncertainties- which are common realities in Nigeria.

The psychological burden isn't only the inconvenience. It's the constant need to stay mentally prepared for disruption. The reduction of mental bandwidth to focus on other needs needed to thrive- the brain has less room to dream because it is busy protecting survival.

Also, there is something psychologist called “allostatic load”, which is the chronic exposure to unpredictable stress that cumulates as wear and tear on the body's stress-response systems, leading to a state of constant vigilance that can make it harder to regulate emotions, sustain attention, make complex decisions, and recover from setbacks.

From this perspective, some choices that appear irrational from the outside begin to make more sense. If your nervous system has spent months wondering where the next meal will come from, buying an excessive amount of food when money finally arrives may not simply be impulsive spending. It may be an attempt to restore a sense of safety.

The bank account may have changed overnight. The nervous system has not.

This doesn't mean every financial decision made under stress is helpful, nor does it mean people aren't responsible for learning healthier ways to manage money.

Personal responsibility still matters. Financial literacy still matters. Planning still matters. However, understanding behaviour requires us to ask not only what someone did, but what psychological need that behaviour was trying to meet.

Perhaps Maslow's hierarchy is less like a staircase and more like a balancing act. We flourish when life becomes predictable enough that our minds no longer have to spend every waking moment preparing for the possibility that those resources might disappear.

Therapy in Everyday Life aims to remind us that understanding ourselves is the first and important step toward changing how we live.

References

• Booth, James. (2024). A Theory of Human Motivation, A. H. Maslow (1943) (Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs) A Perspective Review of Common Misconceptions and Notes On The Revisions. 10.2139/ssrn.4968309.
• McEwen, B. S. (1998). Protective and damaging effects of stress mediators. The New England Journal of Medicine, 338(3), 171–179. https://doi.org/10.1056/NEJM199801153380307
• Mullainathan, S., & Shafir, E. (2013). Scarcity: Why having too little means so much. Times Books.